Intended for 15'x12' projection, mixed media, 2017
I use media art to explore representation and memory.
This video is an excerpt from the projected poem portion of my ongoing You Left Me Early project. For this central piece in particular I wanted to use text rather than picture to emphasize the power of words to seriously change the course of history and individual lives. The poem is broken into 2 parts in this video: "Naming" and "You Left Me Early". In "Part I: Naming", I introduce my name, Xia, which in Chinese means "dawn." Not only does this word suggest the time of day I was left by my birth family, it can also be interpreted as the time in my life--early.
In "Part II: You Left Me Early", I explore my relationship to the open letter written on September 25, 1980 by the Central Committee of the Communist Party of China, on controlling the population growth in China--the letter that essentially lead to the introduction of the one-child policy.
This video was first presented on a 15'x12' ft. screen, and is intended for large scale projections as it contributes to my goal of taking up space and ensuring my message to China is impossible to ignore.
Transcription of the poem:
PART I: NAMING
霞
(XIÁ): RED CLOUDS
霞
(XIÁ): DAWN
YOU LEFT ME EARLY
(XIÁ): DAWN
霞
PART II: YOU LEFT ME EARLY
YOU LEFT ME EARLY
BEFORE I COULD SPEAK
YOU LEFT
ME EARLY
BEFORE I COULD SPEAK
BEFORE I COULD SPEAK
BEFORE I COULD SPEAK
UNDERSTAND
WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO
DID YOU HAVE TO GO?
??????????????????????
YOU LEFT ME EARLY
YOU LEFT ME EARLY
BEFORE WE COULD SPEAK
THE FOLLOWING IS AN OPEN
OPEN
LETTER FROM THE CENTAL COMMITTEE
OF THE COMMUNIST PARTY
OF CHINA
THE CENTRAL COMMITTEE OF THE COMMUNISR
PARTY OF CHINA
SEPTEMBER 25, 1980
x3
. . .
ON CONTROLLING THE POPULATION GROWTH
IN CHINA
IT WASN’T YOUR FAULT
[THE LETTER IN CHINESE/ENGLISH]
SEPTEMBER 25, 1980
IN CHINA
MARCH 2, 1994
IN CHINA
IT WASN’T YOUR FAULT
IT WASN’T OUR FAULT
I WAS BORN
PART III: PREDETERMINED WORTH
don’t tell them you’re a girl
but more importantly
don’t tell them you’re afraid
they want to believe that you are
but even if you are don’t let them take that from you
they already
took so much
PART IV: maude, i hope you found love
all the images of adoption i have
are colored early morning sky.
the elevator doors opened
and it looked like a horizon of babies.
rays of light radiating warmly like they do at the crack of dawn.
crawling towards us looking
for any human contact they could get.
if i was a puzzle they were my pieces.
if they were a puzzle i was their piece.
peace.
peace:
something that doesn’t
come easily when
the first memory you had of
love was it leaving
(but you will find it.)
(and it will find you.)
part v: to whom it may concern,
we weren’t missing.
we were here.
but not there.
(we were anywhere but there.)
but we were here.
we weren’t missing.
where were you?
it wasn’t your fault
we weren’t missing.
where are you?
it wasn’t your fault
we weren’t missing.
we are here
[end]